Sunday, November 4, 2012


 The Five Love Languages, Singles Edition by Gary Chapman
White Christmas (Mom didn't believe that she's made me watch so much I have almost every word memorized! About 20 minutes in she conceded.)
"Hundred More Years"  by Francesca Battistelli

They can laugh
They can cry
The future looks so beautiful and bright
They can dance
Under the moonlight
‘Cause God is smiling down on them tonight
And she wants to stay right here
Make it last for a hundred more years

These past few months have been crazy. I've brought people back into my life that have been gone for a while. People have come into my inner circle that I never would have imagined. And some people have left me, like a person without a coat in winter.

Learning to be pursued. Such a different feeling. You want to know me, you want a relationship with me (of any kind) PURSUE me. I may just pursue you back...

Being KNOWN is such a lovely thing. It's painful at times. It's hard to be transparent. But to know that someone knows me so well...

Do you SPEAK my language? Do you even know what it is? Have you even bothered to try? To have someone who cares enough to communicate  in a way you understand...

I often feel like two different people. The one is brave, fierce, and strong. The other is delicate, gentle, and sensitive. Few people see both.

Over the past few weeks I have been learning that if someone is searching to pursue me, is willing to get to truly know me, and find a way to speak my language means I am LOVED.

This is getting very tricky...  I am feeling like a novice.

Thursday, November 1, 2012


 The Five Love Languages, Singles Edition by Gary Chapman
Chicago Fire
"22"  by Taylor Swift

It feels like a perfect night to dress up like hipsters
And make fun of our exes, uh uh uh uh
It feels like a perfect night for breakfast at midnight
To fall in love with strangers uh uh uh uh
We're happy free confused and lonely at the same time
It's miserable and magical oh yeah
Tonight's the night when we forget about the deadlines, it's time uh uh

I don't know about you but I'm feeling 22
Everything will be alright if you keep me next to you
You don't know about me but I bet you want to
Everything will be alright if we just keep dancing like we're 22, 22

What does a perfect day look like for you? When was the last time you thought about it? When was the last time it changed?
I've found over the past few months the details of it have changed. But the truth is the core of my perfect day hasn't changed. I want to be with people I love and who care about me. I want to encourage and uplift those that I spend time with. Today felt like a pretty perfect day. Today I felt like I mattered again.
I know that may sound strange, saying that I feel like I mattered again. But I have had some people make me feel extremely obsolete since my surgery. Slight newsflash... I didn't die! So when my friend told me she needed someone to talk to, it felt nice. I hate that she was going through so much, hated that she needed someone to lean on. But felt blessed that she trusted me enough to share what she was going through. I sat and shared with my friend. I climbed in the playhouse with her kids. And shared some of my life's distractions with her.
With that said:
Dear God, Thank you for what felt like a pretty normal day. I don't have a lot of those anymore. Dear L, thanks for letting me be your sounding board. Dear IHOP, Thank you for your yummy carrot cake pancakes, you made me happy. Dear Mrs. P and Sweet P, you always make me smile. Especially while we play peek-a-boo. Dear McDonald's Jungle Gym,  Thank you for being one of the first things to not make me feel old!!! Dear Abba Daddy, Thank you for today!!! It means the world to me that I can make a difference!!!
Credit for the inspiration behind 1 sentence letters: